I have to admit for a few months now I have been neglecting something that God has called me to. A big part of our ministry here is accomplished through Support Raising. In the beginning I was not too fond of the idea. After time and much work God had to do on my heart, I came to not only accept it but enjoy it. After all every invitation I extended came on the heels of sharing what God is doing through our family. Our ministry at The Compass, Lighthouse and all the areas we didn't expect that he is using our kids. In many cases I have been told what an encouragement it has been to hear. Recently I have neglected that responsibility.
My neglect comes from guilt. Guilt that stems from our current economy needing to ask for help. Everyone is struggling. Rising gas prices, food cost and everything in between is hard on everyone. We came up here fully trusting God in our finances and His ability to provide for our family. Not to mention in the middle of the height of covid lockdowns. He was faithful to move in the hearts of those who HE wanted in ministry with us. I cant help but think about Moses.
Moses left behind a cushy life in Egypt only to be commissioned by God. After leading the Israelites out of Pharoah's captivity, they find themselves not knowing how they will be provided for. It was there that God walked with them day by day, night by night. Their very life depended on God showing up. He was faithful through and through. So much so, He was faithful for 40 years in the dessert. We moved from Arizona, the dessert. I know all too well how desperate one can feel walking in the heat of the sun without water. It is nothing short of miraculous that God sustained millions of people in the dessert for 40 years.
As I type this, I am reminded of all that God has done for me and my family. I am thankful. It is easy to think about all the red lines on the budget... but we always seem to have enough. There always seems to be gas in the car, food on the table and enjoyment to be had. I am grateful for all those who said yes to God's prompting their heart to join us in serving the youth here in Alaska. It is because of God and God alone that I am able to be here, live and support my family. If he did not move in the hearts of others, we could not have walked away from a career that would have set us up financially very well. If it was not for Him, I could not have given up my desire to pursue nursing.
I guess what I am sharing is my heart, even in the midst of God's work and provision all around me I can loose sight of what he is doing. Like the Israelites who walked with God Daily and were sustained by His love, mercy and grace could bring themselves to believe God would lead them from captivity to die in the dessert. Matthew says that the birds do not reap or sow yet God provides for them...how much more precious am I to Him? Or how much more precious are you? Immensely! God chose to have a relationship with us, not the birds. We are created in His image not the birds. God chose to come and die for you, for me. Even in the hard times he is there. What can I learn from this situation? For me it is this...
Help me with my unbelief Lord. You have sustained me thus far, my mind knows you will continue to. Help my heart to feel the same.
